All my titles are published through traditional publishing methods…but the only route left for the ever increasing mob of the great moaning unpublished is via free self-publishing, where quality and professionalism are replaced by cheap shit proprietary computer file downloads.

Who writes a novel over a three year period, allows it to be converted into a proprietary computer file and then downloaded for 99c a copy?

Sadly thousands of rejected angry authors that’s who! Those weak of mind and spirit willing to sell their souls to the free self-publishing companies that use marketing techniques aimed at stroking the egos of the great moaning unpublished with offers like:

  • Authors given full creative independence (code for playing the ego card).
  • No manuscript rejected (code for we don’t care about the content quality).
  • Huge royalties of 50 to 70% of the license code price (code for 50-70% of nothing is still nothing).

But are these promises of full creative independence accurate? Well not if these two samples from an online self-publishing website’s terms and conditions are to be believed:

2a. Publication of Work As Is. Generally, xxxxxxxx will Publish Author’s Work as it is delivered to us, and not edit or modify the Work. Certain modifications may occur caused by file or design conversions. xxxxxxx does not guarantee accurate preservation of the original Work’s formatting. To assist authors with their book formatting, xxxxxxxx has published the free xxxxxxxx style guide.

5. Formats of Digital Conversions. Author shall submit their Work as a Microsoft Word .doc file. Xxxxxxxx shall utilize its proprietary technology to convert the book into multiple ebook formats, and publish the work for use in sampling, distributing and selling the work. The author/publisher is not authorized to independently sell or distribute xxxxxxxx-generated file conversions outside of the xxxxxxxx site or xxxxxxxx distribution network without first receiving written permission from xxxxxxxx.

One click on these terms and conditions and an author is doomed , but none of the angry unpublished are reading these terms and conditions and the 99c shit is getting out there in monstrous amounts swamping the good and the great stuff. A good author wouldn’t get out of bed for 99c a copy first time around. Okay after 20 years of a book’s life in print, but as a first product not a chance, but then a self-published eBook is not a real book anyway. Once read it’s becomes just another useless computer file. Cannot be given away, sold or donated to a library. It however, can be stored on the expensive e-reader so many have been sucked into purchasing.

Why do self-publishing websites exist? What’s in it for them publishing the shit rejected by traditional publishing houses? They feed material to feed the proprietary e-reader sales business. No good having e-readers and nothing to read, but in the end it’s a pure numbers game. 99% of everything that’s written and submitted to publishing houses is pure shit. Millions of pieces of written shit are rejected every year by traditional publishing houses, but somebody discovered that in this electronic age of the internet there’s real money in selling permission to read shit to an unsuspecting public. What one actually downloads and pays for permission to read is a lottery and for 99c per download one can only expect shit to flow across the screen of one’s expensive e-reader.

How does this system works in practice? A company offering full free turnkey self-publishing services creates one million new eBook files a year retailed at 99c each. At this very attractive price each of the new one million eBook files copies attracts one new buyer a week for a full year.  This means the company sells 52 million downloads, but each individual author only receives royalties on 52 downloads…70% on 52 license codes sold at 99c each = total income of $35.88. That’s not very inspiring is it? Scam of the century for the authors? The difference between rejection and self-publication/gratification is less than 36 bucks.

Let’s just spend a few moments on the customer here. When a somebody buys a real book they can hold it, smell it and read it. When finished they can give it away to friends or family , sell it, put it in their library or give it to the local library. It’s theirs to do with as they please as a purchased product. Can the eBook download customer do this? Nope, the license code only allows the customer to read and store the computer file. Yes eBooks are actually proprietary computer files containing the embedded words the downloader thinks they want to read. The eBook is like a virtual Darth Vader…”more computer software than book” and are controlled the same way proprietary computer software companies control its products. An eBook is NOT an electronic version of a real printed book.

Now lets get back to the author who self-publishes and allows an organisation to sell downloads containing his or her words for 99c each. What’s the customer expecting for 99c? To be honest shit! And remember you will be blamed because it’s your name on the shit front cover. Your reputation as an author will be ruined if you  self-publish shit for whatever reason. You will become known as a shit desperate writer and bad reputations are almost impossible to live down.

You will read about self-published authors who have sold a million kindle formatted eBooks. Actually they have sold one million eBook license codes, but saying sales looks far more impressive. However, let’s look at the facts. The authors making these claims are already best-selling print authors with massive reputations. Their eBook subject is usually how to make millions from silly buggers willing to read and believe! But here’s the real clanger; selling 1 million eBook license codes at 99c gives the same return as selling 100,000 real printed books at $9.90 or 10,000 real printed books at $99.00 which for the record I have done. I much prefer my route it was a lot less work and I hazard a guess a lot more fun.

Epilogue: As it stands the great moaning unpublished determined push to get its shit published via the current free self-publishing services provided may destroy a complete industry that employs real people in real facilities around the world. The self-published shit creator is nothing than part of a lynch mob spurred by monopolies who want total control over the all writers and readers alike. George Orwell where are you when we need you?